Did you ask?

   The wholeness of life and vitality is already complete through faith in God in the fullness of His victory in Christ. The reason He ‘requires’ anyone and everyone to ask of Him in the name of Christ, and continues to require being asked, is to keep men and women away from falling out of natural appreciation into the unnatural temptations of the powers of prideful self-deification. Not as the adversary does, He will not invade any of our rights of will to do as we wish whether it be for His greater purposes or each our own particular interests.

   Where the friction comes into conflict with God’s leading will is not our naturally given physical desires. It is in allowing our fears to inhibit trust in those who depend upon us and trust us to uphold a sense of balance. We, then, are caught in judging our own desires, desires of others, and desires from God’s ongoing guidance, and evil non-human desires invading our attentions from an unnaturally invading spiritual realm. Without the discernment, given in response for the asking, from the Truth of God’s Word we cannot distinguish between human instinctual decisions and prompting from satanic pressures.

   Demonic pressures are not untoward desires of the flesh in the usually understood sense. They are influences that confuse loyalty with behavior. Satanic sway works to ‘guide’ a person’s attentions to be fearful about physical acts of self-expression with the intent to ignore loyalties. Whereas, godly acceptance of personal instinctual flesh desires with respect to the appreciations of Christ’s authority through those whom we are associated gives the proper perspectives needed to see the devil in circumstances for who he is.

   The sense of ownership of God’s gifts of creative enthusiasm many times leads to corruption of intent to where having a certain gift or power over nature is too impinging upon God’s amalgamation, respectfully, of each and everyone’s personal wills to choose in the Body of Christ. This is where the law of works gets ahead of the risks of faithful trust. In that we find any variety of scams designed to pry out from our yearning the submission to self-denial for the ‘better good’ of community standards.

   For example, many profit centered ministries will ‘without fail’ brow-beat listeners with messages of obedience to God with focus on personally private physical behaviors everybody knows in worldly wisdom are destructive to wholesome living. The purpose for this, by intruding wedges between men and women and their children (whether in direct suggestion or through monetary guilt management) is twofold: One, to establish and keep established community behavioral standards; two, to equate mammon with godliness in such a way that Christ is brought into the world rather than the world being lifted up into Christ.

   The undermining social battle throughout the ages since the Garden of Eden has been to disorient the orientation of the order of authority in personal desire. Again, the sham of a scam perpetrated by satan is focus on the symptoms of disobedience as if the resulting works of disrespect for one’s own place in authority are God’s desire to apprehend. The Bible teaches that acts of disobedience are not physically purposeful to throw aside right behaviors, but are the manifestation of dismayed frustration over inconsistencies in respect for who any of us is unto others, unto God, through Christ.

   Because the many membered body of Christ (1st Corinthians chapter 12) provides the latitude of full knowledgeable expression of faithful awareness, keeping God’s will of Authority in Christ responsive to ongoing decisions in mortal endeavors allows each person’s permissions to rightfully respect with others the purposes those permissions have throughout the Word of Creation. Therein, a husband and wife have the rights in unity of purpose, under the Authority of God in Christ, to ask of each other anything and everything. Whether there is a “Yes” or “No” is always a matter for open joint discussion in respect and prayer for reasons why.

   Any of their children have the rights of authority given to them by grace from God, through their parent’s joint decisions in dispensing God’s grace of rights to ask of them their wishes and what they may do to help their parents. Children are under God’s designed Authority to respect their parent’s decisions about what and whom they may or may not involve themselves. For a child, a ‘Yes” is a “Yes” and a “No” is a “No” where any changes from a “No” to a “Yes” or a “Yes” to a “No” is in the sole authority of both the parents to agree in decision. Children, in reliance in the authority of their parents in Christ, do not have the blessing of freedom to inquire of others not their parents without parental consent.

   A child may ask “Why” and either get an explanation or not – and be pleased with the decision(s) (though possibly disappointed) for respect of love to his or her parents. A man or woman may ask of their mate “Why” and are in full authority by, of, and in Christ to require a forthright explanation. Easily understood is that other family members, friends, neighbors, and convenient others in proximity, do not have the position and authority to be asked of, or to ask of, a husband and wife matters of personal nature. Those matters are exactly in the expectations Jesus Christ holds a man and woman responsible unto Him... to exercise their faith and endurance for His sake to rely in their married togetherness in asking of Him.

An inquiry into the importance of asking, rather than expecting without having to ask, may be found by dissecting for emphasis James 3:8-18, 4:1-8:

James 3:8-18

8 “But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.”

   Honestly open in asking another to help where help is needed is ignored when our desires are more in focus than who we are with. Who we are with depends upon our own committed reserved priorities. It is the ‘job’ of those others to acknowledge the limits of their requests in regard to personal loyalties.

9 “Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God.”

   When another does not suit what we desire, we project our anger at God toward those who do not fulfill our expectations. Then, because we know God is not the guilty party, we re-attribute our resentment to those we believe are in contradiction to our way.

10 “Out of the same mouth proceeds blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.”

   We bless others for giving to us our desire and curse others when they do not comply with our own will.

11 “Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?”

   Soothing emotional warmth, and a “helpless poor me” painful struggling, to draw another into serving our desires, brings stiff upbraiding of their reluctance to automatically cater to our advances.

12 “Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.”

   Another’s place before God in His will cannot be God’s will in doing for us what we desire when we do not respectfully ask them to fill in where we need help.

13 “Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him show out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom.”

   A wise and Gospel centered person will ask, and expect to be asked, of others as circumstances of living bring events where people working together create and build solutions to problems and difficulties. Too often, we expect others to tow the line of perfection in thinking their error is the cause of our own miseries, discrepancies, or inner turmoil.

14 “But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth.”

   Being angry when another does not do as we wish them to without asking causes resentment about a false insult against our own egotistical compensation for personally retained inadequacy.

15 “This wisdom descends not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish.”

   Ideas that people should help others without being asked, as if they are somehow lacking presence of mind and heart to care, is implying that if God were their guide they would be “naturally” inclined to service our needs.

16 “For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.”

   We are jealous of another who chooses to require us to ask of them to choose whether or not they will to spend their time and efforts for us. We forget they have standing obligations to their faith in God.

17 “But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be entreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy.”

   When we honestly ask of anyone their assistance we are giving them the respect and courtesy to honestly agree or decline without the emotionally loaded risks to be in jeopardy of accusation and disdain.

18 “And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.”

   Straightforward communication, as Jesus Christ asks us to use in following Him and His example to us, shines the light of His Truth through our practice in non-manipulation of implied persuasions. The light of our honesty, in asking our wishes of another, shines forth to vanquish the adversary’s darkness by sidestepping the swaying of ignorance in persuasive hints and suggestions. Showing a peaceful way is not necessarily calm, collected, appeasement to selfishness in the name of thrift or decency.

James 4:1-8

“1 From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?”

   Battling over who did or did not do what to whom by the will of their own living as expected to supply the will of our own living, without being honestly in risk of being rejected, comes from gossip driven by our own betrayal of who we expect to fulfill what we have not openly asked them to fulfill.

2 “Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.”

   Lust is not in doing what we should not have done, and lust is not in wanting to do what we should not do. Lust is dishonestly manipulating others without respect to their own right to uphold their faith in God to whom they have chosen to honor with their loyalty and commitments.

3 “Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.”

   Lust (coveting), is based in jealousy over what we believe we have missed by association with our perception of others’ possessions and experiences. Lust is generated in wanting what others have when God already has for us His designed blessings.

4 “Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.”

   When we genuinely give to others, it is not an intended recompense to receive or pay any obligation in position to and with them, unless our giving is in direct response to their having asked of us to give. Giving is an extension of God’s blessings to others through our hands and is not dependent upon their desire of need. It is dependent upon their having asked of us and our own choice to respond to their plea. Adultery is stealing influential authority by prying into the personal affairs of a married man and woman, and their place of responsibility over their children, under God’s Authority.

5 “Do ye think that the scripture says in vain, The spirit that dwells in us lusts to envy?”

   To say, “He shouldn’t have to be asked” or “She shouldn’t have to be asked” forces disrespect to the one who has the duty to give. It opens vindictive attitudes of spiteful retaliation for no reason other than the habitual scrapping self-protective defense – ‘a fight looking for a place to happen’.

6 “But he gives more grace. Wherefore he says, God resists the proud, but gives grace unto the humble.”

   Temperance, patience, and long-suffering find their grace for continuation for the sake of committed love through faith in promises; as a man is responsible unto God for his wife and a woman is responsible unto God for her husband.

7 “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

   A belligerent stalemate of incommunicative conflict is simply because one or both in a marriage has refused to openly ask of their mate, and/or has failed to receive honest answers. The usual reason for this is one or the other of a marriage has confided in someone else who is not a part of the marriage.

8 “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.”

   Reconciliation is, of course, found through the word of a woman to her husband and the word of a man to his wife, as our word is an example of God’s Word. It is not the content of what may be revealed (honest revealing respects the vulnerable trust necessary for empathy) that matters so much as it is the sharing of all a man is with his wife and all a woman is with her husband. Together, the exclusive sharing companionship takes all they are together to the Throne of grace and mercy of God in Jesus Christ. His ever-present promise is sure and true to respond with His loving-kindness and healing in His victory over any evils of troubles the adversary throws our way.

   Open honesty without fear of retaliation in respect to Who Jesus Christ is for us is His only answer to bring His will into living for Him in our purposeful sharing. In this, many marriages are undermined by children vying for attention by posing themselves between their parents. Playing one against the other seems to work when there are fears between a man and woman concerning the unity of marriage finding difficulty, derision, and upset. Children use this fear of conflict to gain for themselves, and thereby lose the very joys of living they have yet to appreciate.